Ten Things I Hate
by HARRY.POTTER.QUICHE
Summary: Ten Things About You AU, with Dolores Umbridge/Peter Pettigrew. This is for the QL, and I feel the strong need to confirm that I had no choice for the pairing.


**Based on** _ **Ten Things I Hate About You.**_

 **For the QL, playing as Beater 2 of the Tornados.**

 **(object) Broken wine glass**

 **(word) Attractive**

 **Pairing: Umbridge/Pettigrew**

…

Peter lit his cigarette and tried to dramatically blow the smoke in front of his face. It didn't work. He coughed. He groaned internally. How was he meant it use it to look cool, if he couldn't even do it properly.

He covered it up with his hand, turning away from the guy who had been staring at him from across the canteen. He'd probably ruined it now, dammit. He'd tried to channel all sorts of people, and work on keeping up his rep, and acting all cool like-

"Hi!"

Peter tried to cover his jump by quickly turning his body away from the guy standing in front of him.

"Hi, my name's Remus Lupin! I'm in your year, I'm new."

Peter blew the smoke in front of his face, this time succeeding and the guy in front of him ending up with the face full of smoke. "You say that like it explains you staring at me from across the school for the last week."

The guy, Lupin, went red and scratched the back of his neck. "Sorry, I just, I mean, I… Um, I mean I was wondering if you'd do a favour for me. Maybe?"

Peter was liking the way the guy looked terrified, and resisting the urge to smile. He had to keep his cool. He looked down pretending to be uninterested.

The guy amended. "Actually it's more of a job."

Peter's head snapped up. "And by that, you mean?"

Lupin nodded immediately. "I'll pay you."

Peter smirked. "Now, why didn't you say so in the first place?"

…

Peter sat on the bench by the field. He held the cash tightly in his hand. This was why he was doing this. It was worth it.

And then Dolores Umbridge came towards him, and his plan went out the window. He resisted the temptation to hide under the bench. She grabbed her bag and started to walk away.

He clutched the money. _You got this, you got this, you got this._

"Hey girly, how you doing?"

"Nice try, screw boy."

 _Crap._

…

Okay, second time lucky. He leant against her car. She walked out of the shop and Peter hurriedly tried to look away. She wasn't attractive, but she want ugly either. Or, at least, no uglier than him.

"Nice ride." They looked up at the same.

"Are you following me?" Peter felt himself shrink back against the car.

"No. I was, uh, in the laundromat across the road and thought I'd say hi."

"Hi." She replied. Peter looked at her for a minute. She glared back. They stared at each other for a long moment and Peter felt that there might be something there, she looked like-

"Listen, asshole, are you gonna move or what?"

Peter jumped and got out of the way of the car. "Not much of a talker, huh?"

She fixed him with one more glare, and then started to back out of the car park. Peter turned away, recognising defeat.

"Do you mind?"

"Not at all."

Peter spun around to see James Potter sauntering towards him, Dolores burning a hole in his back. His flashy car was parked right behind hers. There was a short moment where Dolores made eye contact with Peter, and then her gaze hardened, and she rammed her car into James'.

"You bitch!"

"Whoops…"

 _Crap, she was awesome._

…

"Her favourite bands are stuff like Letters to Cleo. Now, lucky for you, they're playing tomorrow night at this place down the road."

Peter nodded. "Anything else?"

"Oh," Remus finished. "She hates smokers."

Peter lowered his cigarette slowly. Finally, an excuse to stop.

…

He leant against the bar, realising he was doing this a lot recently. In fact it was the third time today. This morning, she hadn't seen him, and he hadn't had the balls to say hi. The second time she had just rolled her eyes at him. But tonight, he was confident. She was on her own, in a bar, and he had been prepped by Lupin; he knew what he was doing.

And then she appeared and he tried to look cool, automatically reaching for a smoke, before remembering he couldn't.

"Are you sure you're not following me?

"No." He said immediately. Laughing awkwardly. "Would you mind, I'm trying to listen." He pretended to listen intently to the music, nodding his head. He saw her staring at him in complete bewilderment.

"You're not surrounded by your usual cloud of smoke."

"Nah, I quit."

"And you like Letters to Cleo?"

"Well, I'm more of a Catchlove fan, but they're not half bad."

Dolores watched him for a moment, looking curious. This was his chance before he lost his nerve.

"Come to Potter's party with me tonight?"

She continued watching him for a few more seconds.

"…Um, is that a yes?"

"No." She called, walking away.

"Is that a no then?" he yelled after her.

"No!"

 _Hell yes._

"See you at 9:30 then!"

…

Peter turned up to the party late, still keeping an effort on his rep. Besides, if she even turned up to the party, that counted as a date, right? As long as he got the cash, he couldn't really find it in him to care. Lupin caught him on his way in, telling him Dolores was already here. Now he had just to find her.

Which was easier said than done.

Twenty minutes later he caught her. "Hey! I've been looking for you. What are you doing?"

She grabbed two glasses from a guy walking past and downed them both. "Getting trashed. Isn't that what you're supposed to do at a party?"

And she was gone again.

Another twenty minutes later, he found her again. And she had made good on her promise. A crowd of people were watching her dance- if, of course, you were being kind enough to call it that- on top of a table. As Peter approached, she took a wine glass - of what he guessed probably wasn't water - off a stranger and downed the whole thing. The crowd cheered and she threw her head back, cheering and dropping the glass on to the floor.

"Whoops." She turned and winked at Peter, before trying to dance again. Her attempt didn't get very far, as she promptly fell. Right into Peter's arms.

"Hey, hey, love, we should get you outside."

"What? No, I'm, I'm fine."

Peter rolled his eyes at the dissembling crowd and carried her out of the house, avoiding the smashed glass.

He found a swing on the front driveway.

"Come on, sit down."

"Hey, hey, Pettigrew, can I have a second?"

Peter didn't turn, "I'm busy, Lupin."

"One second." Peter stood and turned, glaring. Lupin looked at the floor. "Er, I just… The whole thing is off okay? It's not important, she doesn't like me…"

Peter groaned. For God's sake. He needed this money. "Listen, mate, do you like the girl?"

"Yeah."

"Then go for it. If she's worth all this trouble, go for it. Never let anyone make you feel like you don't deserve what you want. Okay?" He put his hands on Lupin's shoulders and waited for him to nod, before hurrying back to Dolores who was falling off the swing.

"Careful!"

She smiled at him. "God, this is so patronising."

He grinned. "Trust you to use big words when you're smashed."

"Well, you know what they say!"

"What do they say?"

He looked up at her face, and her eyes were closed. "No, crap, Dolores, don't go to sleep! Don't close your eyes!"

She slowly opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Hey." She said softly. "Your eyes have a little green in them." And when she smiled, she looked beautiful.

And then she promptly vomited all over his shoes.

 _Crap._ That changed everything.


End file.
